Heart Broken

Two words for last night...heart broken. Our guide was trying to help, I'm sure, by telling Grace what was about to happen. She told her we were about to get on a plane and she said she was sad. The drive to the airport was somber.

We got there and checked in. Grace looked frightened. She doesn't know what an airplane is...another "new" unfamiliar experience.

We finished there and went through security. We didn't want a big goodbye with the Guide that might add to her sorrow so we thanked her and slipped away. Using the potty is a challenge with Grace when we're in private let alone in public. She had to go, so I took her in the airport. It didn't go well, we had to try the squatty potty (one more new thing) and we were both frustrated. I got upset which got her upset and tears began to flow. From here it just went from bad to worse.

We were waiting to board the plane and Grace calmed down momentarily. We finally got to our seats and she began to cry again. At first it was just a sad, sorrowful cry that increased to a frightened louder cry and peaked to a loud "I don't want to go" sob!!  This was the second hardest experience to walk through with her. It lasted about 30 minutes.

I loved and prayed asking Jesus to surround her and calm her little nerves. She gripped the arm rails as the plane took off until her knuckles were nearly blue!  Was she sad because she was leaving home?  Was she scared of the plane?  Did she think she was going somewhere to be dropped off with strangers again?  Would she have to say goodbye again?  Or, maybe she thought she was going to some hospital for another surgery?  There was no way to know but it was all I could do to hold back from breaking down with her.

Finally, a stewardess came to us with a cookie and her language. She began to speak to her and pat her back and Grace stopped crying.  Thank You, Jesus!!  Steven asked what she said to her and she said "sorry" so we have no idea. Maybe the stewardess didn't know much English. All I knew was to bless The Lord she was calm now.

We are not promised an easy journey no matter what path we choose. The promise is Immanuel...God with us. I'm so glad He is!!

Jesus left home and traveled many MANY miles away to rescue me and give me a new life full of hope and blessing!  He introduced me to a new Father and gave me a new name and He offered me everlasting life. I said Yes!  His love is irresistible, unconditional and unending. He's with me in the good times and the bad. We will do the same for sweet Grace. We made it!

Adoption is a beautiful picture of the gospel.