God, I look to You!

I’ve been replaying over and over in my mind the past couple of weeks the words of the song:  “God, I look to You.  I won’t be overwhelmed, give me vision to see things like You do.  God, I look to You.  You’re where my help comes from, give me wisdom.  You know just what to do” (Brian and Jenn Johnson), as we’ve entered this specific time of decision again about adopting. 

The Lord first began speaking to our hearts early in July 2006 and we set out to pursue His will for us.  As those early days and weeks went by we were more and more convinced that this is what God was calling us to do, so we began praying for the child we believed God would bring to us.  I remember praying for her Mom who would give her up and whatever circumstances surrounded that decision.  I asked the Lord over and over again to be El Shaddai to both of them; the God Who is sufficient for every need.  We went through mounds of paperwork and we were approved in China in February of 2007 to adopt a healthy child as young as possible. 

Those first few years we remained full of anticipation and although we received regular updates that the wait time would be longer and longer, for many different reasons, our hope was firm that God was in control and we would wait on Him.   But, honestly, over the past two to three years, we have become increasingly concerned that maybe the Lord had another plan.  We have remained open to follow the Lord in whatever way He chooses to lead, but we’ve really wondered the past year or so if we should withdraw and pursue other ways of supporting orphans.  In fact, the last email I sent to our agency (in January of this year) was to inquire of the procedures we would follow to withdraw our application should the Lord confirm that decision.  We received those instructions but have not acted upon them. 

Then…we got the email with information about “Grace” (our name for her) – the little girl who’s referral we just accepted yesterday.  All the information we received a few weeks ago was her approximate age (which immediately struck a chord that she was born around the time we began) and we learned she loved to sing and play the piano.  I wanted to know more!  Long story short, after calling on our friends and family to inquire of the LORD with us, and after consulting a physician and a lady who recently visited the orphanage where Grace lives and met her…here we are!!  We’ve found our Grace!  God has spoken in so many ways to confirm this is His doing; but one specifically happened yesterday morning early.  I found myself in Genesis 22 where Abraham climbed the mountain to offer his son Isaac on the altar.  We know the whole story is a picture of Jesus, whom God freely gave for all of us, but Abraham received the promise from God of a son 25 years before Isaac was born.  I certainly can’t relate fully but the notes section of my bible under this passage said, “a vision (or dream) from God often times has to die and then God resurrects the vision from the ashes."  What an awesome God Who brings things back to life!!